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rome rules

Yes but can I get a free download now plzkthx?

Copypasta'd from Vanilla Bryce:Yes but can I get a free download now plzkthx?

I'd do it but DoW2 is crack at the moment. Crack I cannot turn away.

Last night I came back from a party, drunk, and started up a new campaign as Egypt. GG EGYPT.

i tried the demo for medieval total war 1 or something. where the crusaders have to defend against Saladin in Jerusalem or something. i got destroyed. it was a tough game to play.

The game just arrived in the mail today, though I haven't been able to play it yet because I was fixing wcom =(

I keep getting backstabbed by my Allies! D:<
Egypt will not settle for this kind of behaviour.

Holy crap this game owns. It just took me an hour of trying to convince myself to stop playing.

I don't bother with the RTS part of it though, it's boring for the most part.

But damn, I'm campaigning as England. I declared are on Scotland and France declared war on me immediately after. I have no allies! Good thing I'm such a badass.

Yeah, the RTS part has got nothing on the actual campaign gameplay. It's the sort of thing that really hooks you in.

Egypt has wiped out Sicily. You're next Venice.
My Turkish neighbours have yet to attack me, yet the Byzantine Empire, who are supposed to be my allies, enjoy breaking our alliance to rape my towns and docks. Do not trust the purps.

how do i get htis game

I'm sure you could torrent it, if you are so inclined. Otherwise, it should be available in most videogame stores, probably at a cheap price by now. I bought the game and the expansion for AU$30.

I bought the game from amazon for $8.

Also the Portugese are alliance breaking fags.

total WAR ah, good god yo, what is it good for
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING listen to me...

Total war! I despise
because it means seiging
towns with innocent lives

total war means tears,
in a thousand foreign spies,
when assassins go to fight
and take their lives

I said total WAR HUH Good God Ya'll
WHat is it good for?
Forcing Milan into favourable diplomatic relations

Total War ain't nothing but a heartbreaker
War! friend only to the seige maker
total war is an enemy to all mankind
My Imam calls you a heretic and it blows your mind

Total War has caused unrest in Islamic population
induction then construction
whose merchant is trading dye ?

Total War it ain't nothing but an alliance breaker
WAR its got one friend, that's the seige maker
War has shattered many a crowned prince's dream
Made him a drunken heathen, flawed defender and mean

Life is much to precious to spend playing total war these days
total war can't give you a girlfriend, it can only take them away

total WAR, HUH, Good God Ya'll
What is it good for? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!



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02-6611-0142-1: i am glad you spent your time on this
lljk:// Dunwich Horror: me too

me three

Urgh.

My Polish empire is vast, but I captured too many towns and castles too fast and can't keep them all under control. The people keep rioting and breaking everything and killing all my damn generals and governors. Also Russia is trying to get their land back from me and the Hungarians and Romans are being douche bags.

Looks like you need to implement a more micro form of management. Whats that called?

Micro-jiment.

I'm playing as Spain and playing a little bit more conservatively than I usually do in terms of building military forces. This has allowed me to amass a huge amount of wealth while using my modest military to take out the Moors followed by Portigual. Now I'm sitting pretty with a ton of cash, a huge and easily defendable homeland and easy access to places I can expand further.

I'll probably play like that my next time around. The way I've been playing so far I've had huge armies and no monies.

I've lost the desire to play for now though, since I bought Madworld. Total War will be sitting on my shelf, waiting until I am between games yet again. I've already got more than my $8 out of it though.

Spain is unstoppable at this point. I was ex-communicated for ages, which let me totally conquer France and Milan while beating back the territory of the Holy Roman Empire. Then I assassinated the Pope and got reconciled, it was almost too easy. Now England, my allies, are going to betray me any turn now, but thats ok, its about time I conquered them. I'm going for a 10-turn plan where I let England attack me, then totally dominate them in return, as well as taking any more Holy Roman Empire territories I want. By the end of this I'll likely be excommunicated again, at which point, when I'm done wiping out England, I'll assassinate the Pope again and things will be sweet.

From there I'll probably turn my attention to the Turks (current allies), as they are the only powerful Islamic nation left for me to vanquish.

The map

My King

so now we can have tapas in Tyneside?
and bull-fighting in Birmingham?

EDIT: Birmingham already has it's own Bullring, but it's a shopping centre.

Sebastian is not pious enough and is utterly stoic!

Some would say he's a tyrant.

Son of a tyrant.

The map after playing all night.

Wait wait wait...

Utterly stoic and wildly extravagant at the same time? That man is amazing.

The map now..

My King's right hand man, who rides a black stallion ;OOooOO
and is also utterly stoic and wildly extravagant at the same time
they share a bond

My top priest

My top spy

And my top ass-ass-in

(yes that is a male protistute for luring his victims)

guess who ain't shit? the mongols ain't shit

and the map now
just gotta clean up russia (easy) and the horrible black stain in the middle east (hard)

Kill the pope, I don't care if it crashes the game. Kill him! And when he comes back kill him again!

I've killed him about 4 times in this game so far, everytime replacing him with a more favourable pope. Got 2 assassins sitting around sabotaging Rome, honing their skills.

Ok have officially finished the game.

Here's some pictures you may want to check out if you want to see the crazy end game.

Military rankings

Diplomacy

Pope

The final battle
And the final battle's generals and their armies
111
222
333
444

GG no re

i like how King Jerome the Unstoppable is warlord of terror, a butcher and also everyone's friend.

He's like DDL in GONY.

Copypasta'd from TheMightyPeon:i like how King Jerome the Unstoppable is warlord of terror, a butcher and also everyone's friend.

aha yeah i love that

I've been playing the expansion campaigns, finished a (short) campaign as the Teutonic Order in the Teutonic campaign which was really fun, now playing the Crusades and apart from killing Saladin (on his own, lol) its been pretty boring. Saladin walked upto my castle by himself so I was like "lul time to die" sent out a general and 6 units of knights, they only JUST were able to bring him down, after surrounding and charging over and over. He's one tough hombre, hate to see him fight with an army behind him.

I think I need to write a tips and tricks guide for this game. There is so much simple advice I could give that is oh so important.

Namely about:
-How to manage taxes <-this is most important<br />-How to use priests
-And a basic start off stratagy (for any nation)

Or you could just tell people to play as England, turtle on the British Isles, tech to longbowmen and DMKs and proceed to fuck everybody who doesn't have missile cav. Longbowmen are the fucking shit, have half an army of them with knights and heavy inf in support and you can't loose.

England is surrouned by chritsian nations so it has it hard in the beginning, with the pope always fucking your shit up.

You could probably blitz to Rome in about 50 turns so I wouldn't worry about the pope at all

why not be italy?

You can be Sicily, but you can't be the Papal States which have the Pope.

Is this game like an easier version of civilization? Or more like paradox games?

It's like the bastard offspring of both. Not as insanely deep as paradox games or as general as Civilization.

Its like civ if civ was utterly awesome. Nowhere near as indepth as a paradox game.

Copypasta'd from The Dunwich Horror:England is surrouned by chritsian nations so it has it hard in the beginning, with the pope always fucking your shit up.

Tru nuff.

My English campaign is very slow going. I just erased the french from the face of the earth, but the Pope kept getting all up in my grill and my populace didn't like my multiple excommunications.

You have selected: No

Playing as the Papal States?

That's the crusades expansion, I was playing as the Kingdom of Jerusalem, which is pretty much like the Papal States. I finished the [long] game just before the Mongols invaded. Wiped out the Egyptians first, followed by the Turks. Purple and Blue were my allies, then Blue turned on Purple so I stuck with Purple so we could crush Blue between us after I had fought off the Mongols.

Copypasta'd from The Dunwich Horror:
[Pope](http://i534.photobucket.com/albums/ee348/Dunwich333/Medieval/pope.jpg)

Jesus the Warmonger

Oh God.

OH GOD

Even the RNG God knows I'm a baller.

You'd think I would have run across an Arthur in this game by now. Nope.

Doing a bit of trading.